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Some men struggle with intimacy. Here MensLine Australia explores the notion that men have been socialised to appear to be strong and in control while intimacy encourages and enables vulnerability when connecting with another person. Some men struggle with intimacy, as many men have been socialised to appear to be strong and in control. While intimacy encourages and enables vulnerability as you connect with another person.
This perceived need for men to hide any weakness can interfere with their ability to experience a real closeness, since real intimacy always involves some degree of vulnerability. The experience of emotional closeness. It occurs when two people are able to be emotionally open with one another, and reveal their true feelings, thoughts, fears and desires. This can only occur when both people are able to genuinely trust one another, and feel able to take the risk of being vulnerable.
It is a universal human need; without it we have the experience of loneliness. A perceived lack of intimacy is one of the most common reasons for relationship breakdowns. Men may abandon relationships and intimacy because they fear that they will lose their sense of independence. True emotional closeness is about balancing the sense of yourself while still being connected with another. Men often confuse sex and intimacy. These are not the same thing. Sex without it can be very unrewarding, just as sex with it can be deeply passionate and fulfilling. It is also possible to experience intimacy without sex.
This does not mean that intimacy needs to be lost entirely. What it does al is the beginning of a new phase of the relationship, in which both partners need to invest effort to maintain the emotional closeness that seemed to come so effortlessly early on. Men often feel less able to express the way they are feeling than women, and may feel uncomfortable with discussions about emotions.
However, it is important to remember it is a skill, and as such can be learned. Recognise it is a skill that takes practice. It is not always easy. Achieving emotional closeness involves an emotional risk. If you open up to another, there is always the risk of being hurt if the other person does not react in an accepting way. Trusting the other with your feelings, however, will often lead to them opening up to you as well. If you always wait for the other to open up first, you may never achieve closeness. Even if the other person does not accept the thoughts and emotions you reveal, the relationship will often be better off for your honesty.
Learning to manage the uncomfortable feelings you have when someone does not agree with you, without resorting to attacking or withdrawing, is an important skill. It is never too late to begin again.
When emotional distance has become a habit, relationship breakdown is increasingly likely. The risk to the relationship of not opening up is far greater than the risk of being honest. Seek out an individual or relationship counsellor if you need help with developing intimacy. Further information on intimacy can be found in the latest Relationships Australia booklet:. Renovate your Relationship PDF: 8. Renovate your Relationship is a booklet about men maintaining their relationships and is deed to get men to think about the practical side of relationship maintenance and how to do it.
MensLine Australia has professional counsellors available 24 hours a day, seven days a week, providing confidential and anonymous information and support for all relationship issues. Call us on 78 99 78 or access online counselling. Renovate your Relationship is a resource for men dedicated to helping men maintain their relationships by getting them to think about the practical side of relationship maintenance.
We often talk about the power of connections and support networks, as having a strong circle of people around you is one of the single most beneficial ways to maintain your mental health.
Never have we been more connected to everyone around us. Advances in technology have launched multiple social media platforms allowing us to be no more than just a few clicks away from connecting to someone, or anyone for that matter!
Here, MensLine Australia looks at the s of damaging conflict and what you can do. Listening is an important part of effective communication. Life is busy. In an ideal world, your parents would be a regular part of the mix, visiting them once a week or having lunch on a regular basis.
But in reality, this is rarely the case. Toggle High Contrast icon. Men and intimacy Some men struggle with intimacy. What is intimacy? Difficulties for men Men may abandon relationships and intimacy because they fear that they will lose their sense of independence. Tips for developing intimacy Recognise it is a skill that takes practice. Renovate your relationship - a manual for men Renovate your Relationship is a resource for men dedicated to helping men maintain their relationships by getting them to think about the practical side of relationship maintenance.
Social connections - past, present and future We often talk about the power of connections and support networks, as having a strong circle of people around you is one of the single most beneficial ways to maintain your mental health. Reconnecting with friends Never have we been more connected to everyone around us. Active listening Listening is an important part of effective communication. Tips for adults talking to their parents Life is busy. View more.What intimacy means to a man
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Men and Intimacy